Seriously scary time in my life ..

Possible Trigger warning

Some Graphic description of medical procedures

As its coming up to a year since I was very poorly and had to have an series of operations due to Ovarian Cancer .. I thought I would post this post, its a diary of what happened so that I can remember it correctly in future. I had to take the year off from everything and I am only just able to get back to my work. So, this is an explanation of what actually happened to me last year.

"So .. thought I needed to put something down regarding what has happened to me over the last few weeks (2020) ..

Fri 24th April 2020 .. 8 weeks ago .. I started to get sharp pains in my right side abdomen .. I thought it was appendicitis .. my doctor thought it was kidney stones .. turns out it was a 16 cm growth on my ovary .. spent 2 days in hospital .. CT scan etc .. got sent home .. saying they needed to operate but the growth was so big that an operation atm was out of the question due to Covid 19 .. usually these are keyhole surgery .. my growth was so large that keyhole was out of the question .. waiting for a Multi-disciplinary Meeting .. which never happened ..

Sat 30 May 2020 .. 6 weeks later .. I was taken into A&E in an ambulance .. I could not walk .. or even stand .. I was in so much pain .. I was screaming in pain .. and I can take a lot of pain .. turns out the growth had grown to 18 cm long.. shaped like a bunch of grapes .. so very 3d also .. the pain was the enlarged ovary growth twisting on my Fallopian Tube like a rope .. as you can imagine the pain is off the scale .. its called a Torsian Ovary .. one of the most painful things to experience apart from back surgery ..

Weds 3rd June 2020 .. 3 days after submission to A&E the surgery took place .. they accidentally nicked the bladder very slightly .. therefore had to be repaired .. so surgery took 5.5 hours .. my IV broke down in my hand .. my hand blew up so that I could not use it .. so I came out of surgery with no pain relief and was screaming again .. until they could reattach the IV for pain relief using my other hand .. I was told this .. as I have no memory of freaking out .. my brain must have blocked it out due to how painful surgery was .. they removed both ovaries .. both Fallopian Tubes .. my uterus and cervix .. complete and Total Hysterectomy ..

Thurs .. 2 days on morphine and codeine .. in the middle of the 2nd night I had a series of worsening seizures similar to lockjaw .. could not speak .. could not move my muscles which were taught and stiff .. and all I could do was scream with my mouth closed .. apparently my body was rejecting the IV Paracetamol .. or I had had too much in too short a time period .. I don't know .. I was so spaced I only knew it was pitch black at night and I was in agony .. I remember it all this time .. the nurse above me .. watching me .. was freaking me out even more .. she did not say a word .. just left me to it .. and walked out of the room ..

Fri .. Next day .. I demanded all IVs out .. I was not able to take codeine as it made me throw up .. and am allergic to the coatings on some of the anti-biotics .. which also made me throw up .. so was on anti-sickness pills .. until I finished the course a week later .. so my only pain relief was Paracetamol and Ibuprofen and buscapan .. I had a severe headache for over 2 days from the amount of pain relief I was on ..

Catheter was taken out and I was walking (hobbling) to and from the toilets etc .. had a shower .. hate hospitals .. so I wanted to get out of there as soon as I could .. sleeping in hospital is just not possible and I need my sleep to get better ..

Sat .. they talked about me leaving hospital but .. my daughter was out working and my other son had gone to visit my eldest son .. they would not allow me to go home to an empty house ..

So Sunday I was released and went home .. to try to sleep and relax and get better ..

Today (8 weeks later) .. my final lot of stitches were cut out of me .. and I feel like my journey to recovery is starting ..

I will not be able to drive for 6 weeks .. I will not be able to go back to working part time for 3 months .. and go back full time after 6 months .. I have never not worked .. since I was 9 years old doing my paper-round .. saving up to buy fabric to make my own clothes .. hand sewing them .. so yeah .. I really need to dig deep on how I am going to stay sane during this time ..

So .. yeah .. needed to get this down .. so I don't forget it .. and keep it straight in my head for me to look back on in my future ..

Here's to the next 6 months ..

Susey .. xxx